@7.48AM:
This is me especially every Monday morning ): .
Forever feeling like I didn't have enough sleep even though the amount of rest I had total up t be quite alot.
Presentation is later >_< am going office to put on make up, write out the stuff that I wanna say, then print out.
In the past, I would have choose to write it out, but writing takes up too much times so I decided to type and print out today :) .
Good luck to me ^^.
@2.13PM:
It's nearing the presentation timing.
And I am feeling distress.
:/ , I am not sure if the presentation will go out fine but I choose to believe it will.
I'm worried about the presentation usually only when I donno what to say which in this case, I really donno what to say.
And it doesn't help when I feel as though I feel detached.
@3.27PM:
Am waiting for bus 74, to fetch me from where I am now (outside MediaCorp), to where I wanna (actually don't really wanna) go -- Ngee Ann Poly.
Presentation at 4.10PM, let's hope I'll be there early or at least on time.
Probably will be going home after the presentation.
My real home I mean, haha my mum said she has something to pass me :) .
Going home always feels the best because I love my family so much.
@5.10PM:
Presentation ended.
Didn't go very well.
Determined for a few things:
• Start working on my final presentation + Portfolio + report
• Spend the weekends to play with make-up until I've found the suitable one for myself
• Have a new hairdo to give a WOW effect during final presentation
• Work on my presentation skills
No doubt that I just feel like crying.
But I also believe that I will be fine.
Cuz I believe in the Law of Attraction and more importantly, I believe in myself :) .
@5.47PM:
How about me being too sensitive?
Sorry for being too sensitive then.
For every single fuck.
It's what I am, who I am, how I am like.
Fucking moronic me doesn't know how to fuck to mind my own emotions, I'm not that emotionally strong as you are.
If everyone can control their emotions, who the fuck will get depression, who the fuck will kill themselves cuz of a failed attempt at significant stuff.
At this moment, just let everything fall apart.
I donnid you.
I'm good alone.
Original Dayre update at:
http://dayre.me/dayre/day?pid=jQ6mMNNwxg
@7.50PM:
Updating this from my Macbook.
It's been such a long time since I blog using this Macbook.
Seeing that it has been lagging so badly and such.
I am tired of feeling that I am not good enough.
Tired of letting people step all over my head.
Tired of feeling like I am a bad friend / girlfriend.
Sometimes, when I rant, all I want is someone to listen.
The last thing I need is someone to disagree with me immediately.
Without empathy.
So someone loves using Facebook to show the world how he's breaking down.
How he's tired.
:) guess what?
He ain't the only who feel like shit.
Who feel like his world is collapsing.
I have been trying hard as well.
Trying to give him time.
Trying to make something worth remembering out of our relationship.
I try to counter all these negative thoughts.
By convincing myself to remember what have we been doing for the past 1 year.
Guess what.
Most of what I can remember is staying at home and doing nothing much.
I really think I have done my part trying to hold it all together.
Not everyone is emotionally strong.
Not everyone can deal with anger, stress, sadness all at once.
In the most efficient and positive way.
If everyone can do that, who the fuck needs a psychiatrist.
I am the kind of person who don't like to bottle up my feelings.
If I don't say something, I'll explode someday.
And whatever that I am bottling up is just gonna stress me further.
I say something, whatever I say is wrong.
LOL.
And then when I don't say anything again.
Someone is gonna get unhappy cuz I don't say the fuck what I am thinking.
I am here for you if you need someone to talk to.
But if you are gonna pretend everything is fine and you are coping well.
Then don't fucking attitude me when you feel like you can't manage.
Don't give me the excuse saying you don't want me worrying.
You're not a mind-reader?
Neither am I.
If you want to shut up and pretend everything is ok.
Then seriously take it out on someone else.
More importantly, I am sick with ill-mannered brats and lads all around this world.
Despise the fuckers who find it hard to say thank you when people hold the door/liftdoor for them.
Despise the fuckers who don't know how to apologize when they bump into someone.
I really don't understand what is wrong with people.
Trying to act like they are the greatest fuck just cuz they have bunch of whatever tards supporting them.
If someone don't offend you, then you jolly well shut the fuck up and not comment stupid things.
Cb, don't even know what the fuck is wrong with that fucking tard Nigel aka TooT.
Fucking attitude -.- like wtf have I done to offend him to make him suggest that he wanna pick a fight.
Oh, wait.
Someone said I'm just being too sensitive?
Hell, I am going through an emotional struggle now.
Being sensitive is what I am, what I have been, and what I probably always will be.
If you cannot accept the fuck for who I am, then just bloody fuck off.